5b) Codes of Practice which steer my professional work place

Because I am working freelance  in a variety of different contexts at the moment it has been difficult to locate any set sources for the codes of conduct which may apply to me. So I did some research on the 'People Dancing: the foundation for community dance' website and found the professional codes of conduct applying to individuals registered through the organisation. I thought this would be the closest I could get to relevant codes of conduct for myself. Through looking at the website I also decided that I would like to join 'People Dancing' too as it is such an amazing organisation and gives members a lot of guide lines and benefits. The website divides the code of conduct into 4 sections, 'Professional Competence', 'Responsibility', 'Safety' and 'Working with People'. Then there is the commitment to the code of conduct.
Compared to the list of ideas I created for the codes of conduct applying to my professional practice last week, I found a lot of other points which had not occurred to me. I have recorded these points below.


   'Professional Competence' section:

· What seemed especially apparent was the need to have the necessary skills, knowledge and experience for the work I do and recognising the boundaries of my knowledge. This had not occurred to me as I suppose it is often something which is taken for granted.

· I also found that I had forgotten to talk about the need to be truthful and honest about qualifications and experience, again because I know what I qualifications I have does not mean that everyone else does and I need to ensure I am clear about presenting everything in advance.

· The importance of continuing to develop your skills and abilities through ongoing professional development and keeping up to date with new legislations and developments.

· Responsibility for ensuring others understand what I do.

 'Responsibility' section:

· Honesty, effective communication, thorough preparation, discussion with others to ensure the nature of my work is clearly presented.

· Locate and engage the necessary support required.

· Ensure paperwork and admin are covered.

· Charge appropriate amounts for the work that I do.

· Ensure the good quality of the work of other's who may work in my absence.

· Maintain good appearance and behaviour.

· Monitor my work and take feedback from others.

· Reflect on my work and apply what I learn to improve my work.

· Always fulfil obligations. 

 'Safety' section

• I must keep up to date with legal and statutory requirements.

• Have knowledge of professional responsibilities and liabilities and use these in my work.

• Ensure coverage from insurance.

• Take out the necessary risk assessments.

• I must do all I can to ensure safety of participants. In the event that there is doubt of safety, I should not undertake the project or event.

• Encourage participants to take active responsibility for their safety and welfare.

• Monitor, record and or report any issues of confidentiality and consent.

• Set and agree to appropriate personal boundaries to ensure the integrity of relationships with participants and employers.

'Working with People' section

• Be open, encouraging and adopt a sensitive manner to create an inclusive environment.

• Create time and space to build relationships in order to understand the personal needs of participants.

• Invite feedback and encourage input from others.

• Enable and assist individuals to make independent choices and decisions.

• Respect and acknowledge the position, experience and expertise of other specialist staff.

• Awareness of my own responsibility for personal wellbeing and encourage others to also do the same.

I was quite surprised by the detail of the code of conduct and interested to see how much I had not thought of. In my own list I had concentrated mainly on more focused areas where as the 'community dance' code of conduct breaks down many of the areas I was looking at in to further detail. It urged me to consider many more ethical areas relevant to my work.

 Bibliography

Professional code of conduct (no date). Available at: https://www.communitydance.org.uk/membership-services/professional-code-of-conduct Accessed 29/10/2017

A Sleeping Beauty Workshop at Button and Bear children’s Book Shop

Yesterday I ran a Sleeping Beauty workshop for children between the ages of 4 and 6 with The Ballet Pod, in a children’s bookshop in Shrewsbury. First of all we stood in the window of the bookshop in costume. I was dancing Princess Aurora, Michael Prince Florimund and Clare The Evil Fairy Carabosse. We stood very still occasionally changing our positions for half an hour! Then we went into a special woodland room that the bookshop has, with magical wall paper and fake grass on the floor to give our workshop. First, we read them the story of The Sleeping Beauty, then we taught the children two fairies dances, mime from the prologue, an improvisation with a rose to the music of the Rose Adagio and a finale. Then they performed it all for their parents! It was interesting to see how excited they all became when their families came in to watch and actually, they remained very concentrated. Often, I notice that children can forget what they have learned when they are being watched by an audience but this was not the case for these children! Perhaps the magic of the story had them entranced! In an hour they learned a great deal and performed very well! The audience of loving parents was warm and I also enjoyed dancing for them, even though pointe work on the grass was slightly challenging!

The other challenge was that one child came late about half way through. Obviously, initially she did not really feel a part of the group so she did not want to join in. We tried to welcome her and invite her in but she was very shy. Eventually after eating a ginger bread with the other children, she joined in for the performance and did admirably! It was lovely to see that the audience seemed to help her to join the group rather than intimidate her.  

I have included some photographs from the event. All parents signed consent forms for their child to be photographed for our publicity purposes.

Task 5a) Codes of practice applying to me when bringing dance to community settings

I have been considering the codes of practice which may apply to me when I am working in care homes for the elderly and bookshops, bringing dance to the community. I came up with the following ideas.

• The dancer should use a professional and positive manner when speaking and communicating.

• The dancer should adhere to schedules and timings agreed upon prior to the event.

• A dancer should be clear about what is being presented and adapt it according to the audience. Taking into consideration the age and ability of participants/audience members.

• Consultation must take place with officials of the business for which the dancer works, such as the outreach officer or manager before the event takes place to ensure that the nature of the event ties in with the business/ charity.

• If there are participants or audience members with specific needs/requirements these must be discussed with carers, officials, parents or guardians so that strategies can be produced to ensure all participants and audience members can enjoy the event.

• The dancer should respect each individual with whom they work, ensure that everyone is treated with equal attention and encourage everyone to participate as fully as they can within their own personal boundaries.

• The dancer must pay close attention to the health and welfare of the individual during the time that they are working with them.  Immediately informing carers, parents or guardians if there is any cause for concern.

• The dancer must be very careful when making any physical contact with participants. If this is the nature of the event it must be clearly outlined and where necessary it must be ensured that all parties have signed consent forms for this.

• The dancer must ensure that they receive signed consent forms for photographs and videos and these consent forms must disclose how the photographs may be used. In the event that one party does not give consent they must not be included within any photographs or video footage.

• If the dancer wishes to use any information about the event afterwards on a blog or for reflective study purposes, they should take care not to name any participants and be careful about the information they display such as the place of the performance if detailed information is given.

• Any helpers or co-workers must also be aware of the procedures.

Task 4D) Final Literature Review

Literature Review of The Philosophical aesthetics of dance: identity, performance and understanding

Graham McGee, author of The Philosophical aesthetics of dance: identity, performance and understanding is a professor of Philosophy at The University of Brighton. His book explores the philosophical aesthetics of dance. It focuses on dances as performing art works – performables. It raises questions on the identity of dance works by exploring the notion of multiples – the same dance work being performed by different casts in different places, therefore can it be considered the same dance? He looks at the making of dance works raising issues of authorship. He considers the dancer’s contribution to the performance and clarifies the position of dancer and choreographer, to assess the contribution each is making to the dance work. The understanding of dances is explored through analysing the reconstruction process of past dances and identifying the categories of art which can be used to evaluate and theorise the dance. He specifically looks at the ideal audiences whose judgments might be considered highly important.  

McGee raises the question of whether or not an audience is needed for dance. He looks at a variety of angles, seeing dance as an art requiring an audience for it’s very meaning, then looking at the theory of proprioception and how that might allow for an understanding and meaning through the movement itself; how the dancer’s own proprioception might stand as a replacement for external judgment.

I will be using this book to further investigate the requirement of an audience for dance at all. What the effect of not having one might be and how the dancer’s own proprioception might be of use to their personal development as a dancer. This book introduces some quite complex ideas and they are obviously one person’s view. However, McGee has produced some very well documented accounts with a great deal of research and he is very clear when he is only drawing on his personal views. He is not a dancer himself which means it is the view point of a philosophical kind; this is beneficial to my research which will be exploring the opinions of a variety of audiences.

McFee, G. (2011) The Philosophical aesthetics of dance: identity, performance and understanding. Hampshire: Dance Books Ltd

Task 4D (continued) First 2 Literature Reviews

Review of 'Motion Arrested'

Holmes, O. (ed.) (1982) Motion arrested: dance reviews of H.T.Parker, Connecticut: Wesleyan University Press

This book is made up of a collection of reviews of a number of famous dancers by the well known critic H.T. Parker, known  more frequently as H.T.P. H.T.P was a critic of the Boston Evening Standard for 29 years and within this time he saw many famous dancer’s careers. The book encapsulates a number of accounts he made of the same dancer at different venues on different occasions. It shows his view point as an acclaimed critic. The book shows a selection of his reviews of the dancers Adeline Genee, Anna Pavlova, Isadora Duncan, The Duncan Dancers, Ruth St Denis, Diaghilev Ballet Vaslav Nijinsky, Mikhail Fokine and Vera Fokina, Mikhail Mordkin, Tamara Karsavina, Denishawn dancers, Doris Humphrey’s and Charles Weidman, Martha Graham, Mary Wigman, Harald Kreutzberg, and Yvonne Georgi, Kurt Jooss, Dancers from Spain, Dancers from the East, Dancers from the Soviet Union, Anga Enters.

There are a number of accounts of each dancer allowing the reader to notice connections between performances and alterations in H.T.P’s opinions of the same dancer’s performances. Holmes intersperses the reviews with brief historical backgrounds of each dancer and their context at the time of the review. Holmes also analyses H.T P's natural tendencies as a reviewer by indicating those aspects of a performance, or particular dancers which tended to annoy him and those that would naturally excite and enthuse him.

In the reviews of Anna Pavlova, H.T.P compares performances and explores how her external context contributed or poorly affected the dancer’s performance, he criticises her dancing on a number of occasions stating that if she is to return to Boston she must put his suggested changes in place. The reviews which follow on show that in the next performance he attends she has indeed taken on board his opinion and H.T.P is significantly more satisfied. This is an indication of how the critics opinion can affect the dancer and I will be using this book as a way to explore and exemplify the influence that the critics can have over a dancer’s career.

Review of 'Dancer's stories: a narrative study of professional dancers'

Warnick J., Wilt, J & McAdams, D.P. (2016) ‘Dancer’s stories: a narrative study of professional dancers’. Performance Enhancement and Health, vol. 4 (no. 1-2), pp.35-41. Available at:

https://doi-org.ezproxy.mdx.ac.uk/10.1016/j.peh.2015.12.002 (Accessed 13 October 2017)

This article explores the life stories and identities of 20 professional dancers from U.S Midwest. It forms accounts of these dancers’ memories and personal feelings, illuminating that the majority of them felt the highlights of their careers to be personal recognition of excellence as identified by a teacher or director. Compared with other professions this desire for recognition was ‘striking.’ To further back this finding, the research also proofed that the lowest moments in most of the dancers’ careers had connections to being seen or recognised in negative ways.

Other key findings from this article which are relevant to my topic are that the dancers considered their professions closely linked to their personal identities. They felt that  finding a sense of confidence in themselves was challenging because of the high level of criticism and rarity of recognition that the profession gave. They shared their feelings of the unprofessionalism often seen in the dance world compared with other professions.

It is not a thorough investigation into their lifestyles and detailed descriptions of the dancers’ identities are not recorded. However, I will use this article as a basis for exploring the personal effects of others’ opinions on the dancer

Task 4d) Literature

I have recently spent a great deal of time searching out literature relating to my topic area. I have used a range of search engines including Google Scholar and Summon and I have also searched for books on Amazon. I found Summon to be very good and I found a number of articles. On Amazon I also found a number of books which I ordered. I also have an extensive personal library of dance related books so I have been reading and selecting some which I feel have important points related to my topic. Unfortunately my computer is not allowing me to sign up to Delicious so I am simply going to post my bibliography so far to give some indication of the resources I have found. It is still evolving and I have yet to post my book reviews.

Assaf, N.M. (2013) ‘I Matter: an interactive exploration of audience – performer connections,’ Research in Dance Education, Vol.14 (iss.3) pp 233-259. Available at:

http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.mdx.ac.uk/10.1080/14647893.2012.712103 (Accessed 13 October 2017)

Copeland, M. (2014) Life in motion: an unlikely ballerina. New York: Simon and Schuster

Haskell, A. (1977) Balletomania: Then and Now, London: Weidenfeld and Nicolson

Holmes, O. (ed.) (1982) Motion arrested: dance reviews of H.T.Parker. Connecticut: Wesleyan University Press

McFee, G. (2011) The Philosophical aesthetics of dance: identity, performance and understanding. Hampshire: Dance Books Ltd

Melville, J. (2009) Diaghilev and Friends. London: Haus Publishing

Pepper, K. (2014) ‘Creative encounters and critical conversations.’ Dance Chronicle, volume 37, (iss. 2: Dance critics and criticism) pp. 178-184. Available at: http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.mdx.ac.uk/10.1080/01472526.2014.914870 (Accessed 13 October 2017)

Reason, M. and Reynolds, D. (2010) Kinesthesia, empathy, and related pleasures: an inquiry into audience experiences of watching dance. Dance Research Journal, vol.42 (iss.2), pp. 49-75.

Sutton, T. (2013) The making of Markova. New York: Pegasus Books

Szoporer, P. (2014) ‘Criticism as a contested concept’, Dance Chronicle, vol.37 (iss.2) pp.189-194. Available at:

http://dx.doi.org.ezproxy.mdx.ac.uk/10.1080/01472526.2014.914873 (Accessed 13 October 2017)

Warnick J., Wilt, J & McAdams, D.P. (2016) ‘Dancer’s stories: a narrative study of professional dancers’. Performance Enhancement and Health, vol. 4 (no. 1-2), pp.35-41. Available at:

https://doi-org.ezproxy.mdx.ac.uk/10.1016/j.peh.2015.12.002 (Accessed 13 October 2017)

Task 4B) Special Interest Group (updated)

Now that I am focusing in to the area of how the audience's opinion affects the dancer I have changed the title of my Special interest Group accordingly. I have approached some past colleagues and friends who are joining the group and sent requests to a number of BAPP students who I think would be interested. I would like to extend the invitation to anyone interested in the area of dance, dance teaching and dance performance. I will be exploring the audience's perspective as part of my inquiry so a variety amongst the view points would be ideal! If you would like to join please leave a comment below!

Task 4C) Developing my areas of Wonder

Because the SIG seems to be taking a while to get going as I know everyone is really busy with their own research questions too, I have been considering my initial areas of wonder and developed them through discussions with friends, past colleagues and my performing siblings in one to one messages and conversations. I researched literature on the initial questions I had. What I realised as I was looking more and more into the idea of different performance contexts was that this is such a broad area, there is no way that I would be able to do the inquiry justice within the time limits I have. Reading the book Doing your Research Project by Judith Bell and Stephen Waters has helped me to come to a more systematic approach to my research and I realise that narrowing down ideas to a more specific area will allow me to do my inquiry more justice. The area of wonder that I found myself focusing on more and more was:

 What dynamics are produced from different audiences watching dance and how does that affect the performer?

From this area the following questions emerged.

How does the audience’s opinions impact the ballet dancer’s performance?

What can the ballet dancer learn from the views of the audience?

Is the audience’s point of view really necessary for a ballet dancer to progress?

Can proprioception take the place of external judgement?

What dynamics are produced from differing audiences?

How do views differ amongst diverse audiences?

How does the ballet dancer rate audience’s opinions?

Does the ballet dancer place more value on the point of view of a critical eye or a lay person’s eye?

How do ballet dancers deal with criticism?

After researching literature around this topic, I found that I had a lot of material to draw upon (I will be posting my literature in my next blog as I have not quite finished my reviews.)

I discussed this idea a little with Adesola, Jessica and Emily on the Module 2 skype session last week. Jessica brought up the question of how you deal with what the audience thinks of you, draw negative or positive outcomes from their views and if you as a performer take those views home with you. This idea stuck with me and first pointed my inquiry in this direction.

 I have been discussing these ideas with my Professional Associate Anna Pujol, a past colleague currently dancing with Ballet Cymru (She has agreed to be my professional Associate, granted permission to be named and for me to hyperlink to her biography). We discussed the effects of bad reviews and how although these should not in theory affect how a dancer works they could provide mental strain and ultimately result in detrimental effects on performance. Anna felt this area of research had great relevance.

I also discovered that this is perhaps the most relevant area to my practice as a ballet dancer at the moment. As I have recently been contemplating the fact that I place a lot of emphasis on the opinion of others. I often find it hard to decipher between opinions which are relevant and will help me to develop as a dancer and those that are unhelpful and of no use to me. I am also dancing in slightly more unusual places like care homes and book shops and consequently performing for diverse audiences in close proximity. Often, I will receive feedback from an audience immediately after I have performed and it can be a challenge to fully reflect on what I have done and decide what information is relevant from the views of others. I feel that by exploring how the audiences point of view has affected dancers before me in their performances and how they have used their opinions will help me understand how to use feedback from others to improve my performances.   

Task 4)a: Developing areas of 'wonder'

Having pondered my topic for sometime I have travelled a bit of a journey trying to draw up relevant questions. I now realise that I have so many questions about so many things and they have all begun to get a bit tangled up! I have been trying to narrow them down so that I can begin a thorough research. When I spoke with Adesola and Jessica on the Skype meeting I realised that I was combining a lot of different areas that I am interested in however, now I am clearer on the angle I want to take. Although I am still not entirely sure what my question is, I know that I am interested in the topic area of the impact varying performance contexts have on a dancers authentic expression.  I am particularly interested in placing this question in the area of classical ballet as this is my own area of professional practice. However, I feel at this stage it is more beneficial to research the broader dance area a little bit. I hope this may also spark the interest of others and encourage them to share their thoughts with me.

I want to research this topic because I am interested to find out how ballet dancers in the past have adapted to varying contexts and where the most notable performances have taken place. Also how dancers of today feel about the how their performance environment affects them. It feeds into my professional practice as a freelance ballet dancer, as I want to discover how I can adapt to the varied contexts in which I dance in order to produce better performances. I have only been a professional dancer since 2016 and became freelance in July 2017. Therefore I realise that I am very fresh to the business so I really want to develop myself as an artist and I feel this inquiry could help me.  I am also intrigued to find out if it really matters where and for whom we dance as to the effectiveness of a performance.

The 7 areas of wonder I came up with in relation to this are: 

How can the term authenticity relate to dance?

Where does a dancer feel they can be what they would consider their authentic self? 

Does the context a dancer performs in change the way they dance?

Does a competitive atmosphere change how a dancer performs?

What impact do different audiences have on a dancer's artistic performance?

What dynamics are produced from different audiences watching dance and how does that affect the performer? 

Does the status which a dancer holds affect the context in which they dance?

I created this collage for my questions to help me build on my research process in a creative way.

I would be interested to know what others may feel about this area of research.

Task 4)a Reviewing Part 4

Part 4 of the Module 2 handbook has encouraged me to see the process of research in a creative way.  I found that it was particularly important to identify my areas of competence and capability as this encouraged a consideration of how I can improve the work I am currently doing as a freelance ballet dancer. Please see the following link to my earlier blog: https://annwall95.blogspot.co.uk/2017/10/initial-thoughts-emerging-as-i-embark.html

Part 4 has also led me to purchase a very good book Researching Dance: Evolving Modes of inquiry edited by Horton Fraliegh and Hanstein which is on the BAPP reading list. Like Part 4 of the Module handbook it frequently compares the process of research to the choreographic process in dance and this is something that I find I can relate well to.

Below are some important quotations that I found.

All research begins with questions. The questions you ask reflect what interests you about the field of dance and how you see the world of dance.

(Horton Fraleigh and Hanstein 1999, p 27) 

Scholarly research is a visionary process and is guided by the researcher's ability to see and think about ideas in new ways. This creative and imaginative engagement with ideas in new ways. This creative and imaginative engagement with ideas is what initiates research and ultimately results in the researcher making a significant contribution of new knowledge to the field. Like dance making, initiating research is a cyclic and improvisational process that eventually spirals inward towards a specific research purpose, which is not unlike the artistic concept for a dance work.

(Horton Fraleigh and Hanstein 1999, p 28 )   

I have also just invested in the book Doing your Research Project by Judith Bell with Stephen Waters (also on the BAPP reading list). This book is great as it covers the whole research process providing advice on planning your project, ethics and integrity in research, reading, referencing and the Management of information, literature searching and the review of the literature as well as all the subsequent stages of a project. I feel this will help guide me as I lay down the basis for my research project.

 Bibliography

Bell, J and Waters S (2014) Doing your Research Project, first published 1987. England: Open University Press 

Horton Fraleigh S and Hanstein P (1999) Researching Dance: Evolving Modes of Inquiry, London: Dance Books
Module 2 Handbook (2017) BAPP Arts, Middlesex University, London: Middlesex University

Ideas on Assumptions

Today we had out Module 2 discussion on Skype with Adesola.

I found it interesting to hear other people's ideas on my area of interest. What specifically stood out through this process was that sometimes when you put out an idea of something that you want to find out about, we assume that others will know what we are talking about. However, Adesola stated that she was not sure that I really knew what my area of practice was or why I would want to research my topic. I was surprised that it had not occurred to me to state my area of practice when I was talking as I had felt that I had already explained this in Module 1 in my professional profile. It made me realise that I need to keep questioning everything and continue to return to my starting point in order to be really clear about what it is I want to discover in my inquiry planning. With all of this in mind I am drawing up my areas of wonder to post in my next blog.

Skype Session with Adesola 3rd October

This evening I enjoyed a very formative skype meeting with Adesola and other BAPP students from across all three modules.

Part of what we explored were issues regarding ethics when working as a teacher, what authenticity means to each of us as an individual (this was may area of interest), the difficulties arising from moving to different countries to work and we heard how Gonzalo has been going about his interviews for Module 3.

For me, what really stood out from this session was how the idea of authenticity runs through many of the topics we discussed. For instance, when discussing education, Jess was talking about how she is exploring dance for people with autism and she explained how now autism is just considered to be a different way of thinking rather than a problem. This made me consider how people with autism may feel that dance is a way in which they can express themselves more openly, therefore feel that they are showing their authenticity.

Then Henry was discussing a dance performance he recently saw by Pheonix Dance Theatre which conveyed a political message. This again seemed to me an example of truthfulness or authenticity as it is dealing with current important issues.

Then Jae-eun brought up the issue of feeling the need to change yourself in order to adapt to a different culture when working in another country. This raised the following questions for me which also relate to the concept of authenticity:

How much of ourselves should we be willing to change?
Is it simply our perception of a culture that gives us the feeling we need to change ourselves in order to be accepted within it?
Does it say more about the way we see ourselves rather than the way others see us?

 As a group we discussed how a certain level of competition and pressure can make positive changes to the technical abilities of a dancer/performer. It was suggested that it is the things which are out of someone's control to change such as their height which can be the demoralising factors to self worth and therefore interfere with someone's authenticity. 

 We also looked into the emotional side of training in a vocational school and Henry mentioned that at his school mental health was very much on the back burner. Jess suggested however that the difficulties which arise from the profession can only really be learned once you are working in a professional setting which I thought was very interesting.

Adesola mentioned that we should look back into history rather than just looking to where we will go with the information we discovered while planning our inquiry ideas. So I am now embarking on research through books on dancers such as Anna Pavlova, Michaela DePrince, Misty Copeland and Gelsey Kirkland all of whom had to overcome points in their training and careers where they were told they must change themselves if they wanted to succeed.

Initial thoughts emerging as I embark on Module 2

Whilst working through Part 4 of the Module 2 handbook I have enjoyed considering some of the questions which are raised and I thought I would share some of my thoughts on them here!

Do I work within a disciplinary context in the arts? Or is my situation more transdisciplinary?

Although I am a professional ballet dancer, I am currently freelancing. This means that I am working in a variety of different genres. At the moment I am preparing ballet workshops for children, choreographing dances to perform at a variety of different events. I also create many of my own costumes for the work I perform. I am also setting up a craft business alongside. Therefore I would say that my situation is more transdisciplinary.

What do I know?

• I have knowledge of the technique of ballet.
• I know that when I am sincere as a dancer my dancing is much more powerful   
• I have an awareness of how to work with others
• I am willing to be directed by another/others and seem to feel a bit more at ease when dictated to
• However, I also have a questioning personality and an ability to see when a situation is unjust. 
• I know how to train alone to maintain my technique.

Competences

• Precision in classical technique
• Dancing on stage
• Working with others
• Choreographing in the classical ballet style
• Improvisation
• Adaptation of existing costumes
• Creation of headdresses
• Planning workshops and teaching young children ballet

Capabilities

• Developing the confidence to take more risks and challenge my classical work. 
• Dance in a classical company
• Working with more authority and assurance
• Having more confidence in independent work
• Choreographing with more abandon and creativity in a variety of different style of dance. 
• Teaching older more advanced children and adults
• Promoting my work more.
• Making my own costumes from scratch

Knowledge still required for the future.

• I need to learn how to balance out my energies when working to an intense schedule to avoid burnout.
• I need to learn to accept my short comings but not allow them to affect my confidence. Instead use them as motivation to work harder.
• I need to develop the skills to pick up choreography faster.
• I need to develop a stronger more abandoned and grounded physicality in my more contemporary work.
• I need to learn to be proud of who I am as an individual as this will help me in more competitive situations such as auditions.
• I need to learn to be assertive as this will give me more courage to go out into more situations which may challenge me.
• I have noticed that since being a freelancer, I doubt my capabilities a lot more. Perhaps because I have relied to heavily on the validation of others in the past.  Now I need to find a greater strength to get to the next level as a performer. 

Considering all of these questions is helping me to develop the questions for my inquiry as it is encouraging me to look deeper into myself and discover what I really need to develop as a professional in the field of classical ballet.

I would like to know whether other freelancers out there have also felt a lack of confidence in their independent ability when they are used to being under directorship.